Love Part 3

1corinthians 13:5 It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.

Love is not rude,
Rude:
1.Discourteous or impolite, esp. in a deliberate way: a rude reply.
2.Without culture, learning, or refinement
3.Rough in manners or behavior; unmannerly; uncouth.
4.Rough, harsh, or ungentle.
5.Roughly wrought, built, or formed; of a crude construction or kind: a rude cottage.
6.Not properly or fully developed; raw; uninvolved: a rude first stage of development.
7.Harsh to the ear: rude sounds.
8.Without artistic elegance; of a primitive simplicity: a rude design.
9.Violent or tempestuous, as the waves.
Synonyms
1.Uncivil, unmannerly, curt, brusque, impertinent, impudent, saucy, pert, fresh.2.Unrefined, uncultured, uncivilized, uncouth, coarse, vulgar, rough. 3.Rustic, artless. 9.Stormy, fierce, tumultuous, turbulent.

I had no idea that the word rude had so many definitions, this is very interesting.
I always thought that to be rude was only in speech or mannerism. It looks that it goes deeper than this. It is also possible to be rude in look or feeling.
It is one thing to meet children with these characteristics but an adult my goodness.
Lets break some of this down.
So if love is not rude, this tells me that Love is having, or not being without culture. What is Culture?
Culture:
1. The quality in a person or society that arises from a concern for what is regarded as excellent in arts, letters, manners, scholarly pursuits, etc.
2. That which is excellent in the arts, manners, etc.
3. A particular form or stage of civilization, as that of a certain nation or period: Greek culture.
4. Development or improvement of the mind by education or training.
5. The behaviors and beliefs characteristic of a particular social, ethnic, or age group.
6. (Anthropology). The sum total of ways of living built up by a group of human beings and transmitted from one generation to another.
Wow this says a lot!
If rude is being without learning or refinement then love is to be a learner. The Greek word in the new testament for Disciple, “mathetes”. Comes from the verb manthano, to learn means to be a learner.
Refinement:
1.An improved, higher, or extreme form of something: a refinement of the old system.
2.Fineness or precision of thought, expression, manners, etc; polish or cultivation
3.A device, change, adaptation, etc, designed to improve performance or increase efficiency.
To take something and make it better.
This tells me that the love I have can always be made better, and I can learn how to perfect it when my heart is right.

It is not self seeking,
It does nothing for it self but looks out and puts others before it's self. In any relationship, particularly in marital relationships, if this would become the norm or even be practiced a little. I guaranty the divorce rate would plummet to an all time low!!!! Another word for self seeking is selfish ambition.
In Galatians 5: 19-20 selfish ambition is listed as one of the acts of the sinful nature.
In the book of James 3:16 it says where you have envy, and selfish ambition you will find disorder and every evil practice.
Ouch.....this of course would be considered as the exact opposite of love. Romans 12:10 says to Honor one another above yourselves.
Philippians 2:3-4 Says do nothing out of selfish ambition but in humility consider others better than yourselves.

Imagine a marriage where each partner is NOT looking out for there own interest but more for the one of their partner. I know what your thinking, and at first I thought the same thing. That would suck! I would become a door mat and be walked all over.... But just think for a moment, what if we could just try it for a few days maybe one week in our marriages. That each person in the relationship would focus on the likes, wants, desires, and needs of the other before we would even think about ourselves.
Sadly this might require that some of us first learn truly what those likes, wants, desires, and needs are first. Not what we think they are but what they are....
I think if each partner could really pull it off for a week than it could radically transform relationships.

Wow just the thought of putting away our sinful nature (selfish ambition) and having the same attitude as Christ Jesus who did not consider being equal with God some thing to be grasped but made himself nothing, taking the nature of a servant, being made into human likeness. He humbled himself and became obedient to death- even death on a cross! (Philippians2:5-8) An all I can think about at times is if I get to watch my favorite program or movie on TV, never mind that the program my wife likes is on at the same time. Or that I come home and make myself something to drink with no thought of my spouse who my have just finished cleaning the whole house, is cooking dinner, and has watched the kids all day. The list can go on and on, we need only to think about the other........

It is not easily angered,
Angry:
Feeling or expressing annoyance, Resentment: the feeling of displeasure or indignation at some act, remark, person, etc., regarded as causing injury or insult.; Enraged; Animosity: A feeling of strong dislike, ill will, or enmity that tends to display itself in action.

I believe the majority of the above mentioned definitions would cease to exist when Selfish ambition is out of the way.

It keeps no records of wrongs,
This is a hard one! Oh, how often when the temperature is rising and our feelings and actions toward the other begin to change, and not in a good way either. We think to our self's, thoughts that we should never think about any one. The longer we have had a relationship with someone the worse it could be.
Our mouth opens and out pours the insults. It is in these moments that we are certainly thinking about the other person more than our self's but only in the negative.
Because of something they have said or done or perhaps not said or done, no matter big or small, we unload the history channel on them. It is for the primary purpose of shaming them, trying to point out how imperfect they are and most of the time to make them feel or look inferior to ourselves. After all what they have done has caused us some sort of pain or discomfort, and we can find that reaching into the past with our well kept list of there flaws will always insure our winning of the argument. But if not, at least we have made some important blows, making ourselves feel or look better and we are acting in that moment. That is in fact what the record of wrongs is about. “I am good and you are so Bad, just look at you....... Thank you God that you keep no record of my wrongs. Your love is amazing, and your mercies new every morning. Lord please give me this LOVE.....

Have you ever heard the term a little love can go a long way? As I sit and reread these last three blogs, I think I understand. If we had just a fraction more of this Love, it would transform families, communities, even countries.

Lord give me this LOVE....